After finally settling into my new home (after three months), I now find my garage organized to the point of finally getting access to the three bikes I’ve currently set as my “steady girls” for this summer. My 2009 Harley Road Glide, a 2006 S2R1000 that was my first Ducati, and a recent addition to my collection, a 2006 Paul Smart with some minor modifications and a full Termi exhaust with ECU.

Steady Girls, eh? I’ve written about the first two bikes before, but some might wonder where my 999S went. Well, there’s a bit of a story there that includes a lesson of sorts. The lesson I learned from my 999S wasn’t that it was a bad bike, but rather that it was a bad bike for me. It seemed to whisper sweet things into my helmet once underway. “You can take that 15 MPH curve at 70.” Or on a more sinister note, “… you know I don’t really start running right until it’s at least three digits on that speedometer, don’t you?”

No matter how I tried to resist those whispers, it seemed inevitable that sooner rather than later I would end up having a one-way discussion with an officer of the law (what we call half-duplex communication). So, what to do? Well, this is where the rule of “buy what you can ride, ride what you can keep, keep what won’t get you into trouble” comes into play. While there was nothing inherently wrong with the 999S, it was a bike that demanded to be ridden, and (in my opinion) was a shameful waste on me.

If I were still living in California (where the S2R1000 wasn’t actually fast enough with stock gearing to run comfortably down the super-speedways there), or in Virginia or Maryland (where literally thousands of curves await straightening out in the Appalachian Mountains), it would have been something for the record books. As that isn’t the case, I can only look back and wonder what might have been different if I had gone the Superbike route as my first bike. However, being as that didn’t happen and I don’t have those lush playgrounds in my back yard anymore, it was time to make a change.

So, how hard is it to get a Playboy Playmate off my hands? Well, there is an old saying that no matter how hot a woman is; someplace, somewhere, there is a guy who is fed up with her. Such was the 999S. Everyone was stunned by her good looks, but they didn’t want to step up to the plate. What’s that about super hot women? They’re lonely because every guy is so intimidated by their looks (and performance?) that no one will ever ask them out. In my case, it was me seeking out someone with a HOTTER Playmate and asking them if they wanted to trade (and so my 999S became a 2006 Paul Smart).

Argue with me on this if you will, but the Paul Smart is that stunningly simple woman who needs no makeup or flashy jewelery to stop all conversation when she walks into a room. She’s capable, smooth, and won’t be rushed. The Superbikes are glitz and glamor with spectacular moves, but they’re HIGH MAINTENANCE demanding ALL your attention ALL of the time. You have a fling with a Superbike, you have an affair (of the decades variety) with a motorcycle like the Paul Smart.

It may be a messy relationship, but it’s never dull.

Ken